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1,141 Posts

This has got to be one of the funniest I've heard of in
a long
time. I think this guy should have been promoted, not fired. This
is a true story from the WordPerfect Help line. It was transcribed from a
recording monitoring the Customer Care Department. Needless to say,
theHelp Desk employee was fired, however, he is currently suing the
WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause." This is the
actual dialogue of a former WordPerfect Customer Support employee (now I
know why they record these conversations).

"Rich Hall computer assistance; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmmm. So what does your screen look like now?"



"It's a blank; it won' t accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"

"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind, can you move your cursor around the

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV.
Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the
power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged in the wall."

"Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that
there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"


"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."

"Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"


"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."


"Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power failure."

"A power.......a power failure?.... Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now.
Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was
when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too f ** *ing stupid to own a

Having to deal with the public on regular basis, I can totally understand the tech's response to the situation... very funny though... :lol

3,381 Posts
:lol :lol :lol That is just too funny!!! It's criminal though that a guy would lose his job for saying what should be said to an idiot like that. That's the reason the world population of idiots seems to be growing exponentialy!!! :lol

10,432 Posts
:lol :lol Good one :nicejob

BTW I made it a little easier to read

1,141 Posts
Discussion Starter · #9 ·
Max Power said:
:lol :lol Good one :nicejob

BTW I made it a little easier to read
Thanks MP. My father sent it to me in an email. I just copied it the way it was. Thanks again for making it easier to read. :cheers

298 Posts
Eric said:
:lol :lol :lol

That's almost as bad as the blond stripping in front of the computer trying to turn it on, but there was no response. :lol :lol :lol
Or the one where a woman couldn't work out why her built in PC cupholder broke...it was the CD rom drive tray..... :lol :lol
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